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As Great As Konata

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PostSubject: AX-01   Sun Sep 27, 2009 2:18 pm

Alright guys, I made a story for English class. Feed back would be nice, but by the time you read this, it'll probably be turned in XD;; Anyways, here it is:

In 2120, the world was at war once again. Countries were stripped of their names and the citizens had their rights stolen from them. Thousands of innocent protestors were killed each day. It was non-stop killing. The air reeked of decaying flesh. Bodies littered the streets of every city. It had to stop. So one day government officials and scientists secretly got together to discuss what would be the solution to this chaos. Now, fifteen years later, they have completed the ultimate weapon.

Her name is AX-01, but she is better known as “Ayxa.” She looks like any other human. She dressed like any other human. She interacted like any other human. But she isn’t just a human. Her body has been modified to be able to withstand the worst situations known to man. Guns, explosives, knives, and any other weapon you can think of, would not put a scratch on her perfect pale skin. Her eyes were far better than any hawk’s and her strength allowed her to pick up a skyscraper without any effort. A bat’s hearing was nothing compared to hers. She is the ultimate weapon.

But there is one problem. She is still a human being. Her curiosity in the outside world distracted her from her missions. So the government locked her up. After that, Ayxa refused to cooperate with them. She sat alone in that white room with no windows and ignored us for days. She began to question her existence and it nearly drove her into insanity. That’s when the Japanese Research Team chose me to help her.

I sat in that room everyday with her. At first she ignored me too, but then she slowly started talking to me. She told me about her days she got distracted on the battlefield. Ayxa told me about what she was thinking about during those silent days in the white room. She didn’t understand why she was always learning about “the right thing to do” since the day she was born. She couldn’t figure out why she could take so much damage, and not feel the pain, but her comrades died right next to her on the battlefield. She didn’t know why she was able to lift buildings up with one hand and the other soldiers were tired out from carrying sand bags to the bunkers. She finally concluded that she was a monster, and that she wasn’t supposed to live.

“It’s not your fault that you’re different,” I told her, “You were born that way.”

“That’s a lie. I’m a human too! Why don’t I die or get hurt after getting shot so many times when everyone else around me does?!” she would scream with tears rolling down her face.

At that point, the scientists observing us would escort me out of that room. They said it was because they were concerned for my safety. I felt terrible each time I left that room. A poor innocent girl, who had her life taken from her, was being held prisoner to greedy scientists. And there was nothing I could do.
One day, an explosion rocked the city. Curious as to what had happened; I bolted out my front door to investigate. In the middle of my street I saw Ayxa. A drop of blood trickled down her cheek.

She turned and smiled at me, “I found an escape,” her voice cracked. She looked back up at the sky with her solemn smile, “Thank you and good bye, Rai.” She reached up for her neck and ripped the wiring out from her neck. Another explosion of light radiated from her. When I finally looked back at her, her body was lifeless on the cracked pavement. I knew that I should’ve saved her, the Ultimate Weapon. But instead, I trudged back to my room and cried. The war between an innocent girl and the evils of mankind was finally over.

It couldn't be longer than two pages, double spaced. I would've wrote more....
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Obviously Amused

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PostSubject: Re: AX-01   Sun Sep 27, 2009 2:28 pm

That is really good!
It made me a little sad though.
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Mister Burke

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PostSubject: Re: AX-01   Mon Sep 28, 2009 9:52 am're allowed to make up stuff for that?

That makes life easier.

Also, yeah, it's good.
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